The Ultimate Midterm Study Guide: NU Edition

By Lucas Pettinato

 

EVANSTON — Ever find yourself toppling to the ground to pray to Shiva, God of Destruction, in hopes of having your chemistry midterm annihilated from existence? If so, fear not, for all problems regarding midterms are soon to come to an end. How, you ask? Let’s just say that The Flipside has recently discovered a source known as the Ultimate Midterm Study Guide, a guide which any student of any year can use for any subject. If there exists an American Pie Book of Love for midterm exams, we’ve found it.

 

The Flipside has prepared a small preview for our dear readers containing a few of the many pointers that will guarantee an “A+” on any Northwestern midterm exam:

  1. Make sure to write your name at the beginning of the test. Want a free point? Just write your name at the start of the exam!!!!!!111!!!!11!!!! It’s so simple that no one even thought to try this. Starting the exam off in such a great way will guarantee your success! #blessed

 

  1. Eliminate incorrect multiple-choice answers. Can’t figure out a multiple-choice question that gives 4 possible answers to choose from? Simply cross out the 3 incorrect answers and choose the last answer standing, which has to be the correct response! #confidence

 

  1. Use the test to take the test. Don’t think you have the details to answer a question? Just use information from the test to get information that you need! Everything you need is in the test! For example, if a man named Scott is mentioned on a physics midterm and that same man is mentioned later within the test, his name MUST be Scott! #clever

 

  1. Don’t leave anything blank. Don’t know the answer to a question? No worries! When in doubt, just draw a picture for your answer! For example, don’t know how to explain the nature of carbon? Just draw a car and a Bon Bon, and that makes carbon! #genius

 

  1. Check your work. Not sure if your first answer was correct? Don’t fret! You are allowed to change your answer whenever you want! All you need to do is use an object called an eraser to delete your previous answer and add a new one. The days of wondering if answers were correct on a test are over because now you know that your second answer was not the original, incorrect one! #Einstein

 

  1. Make sure you read all directions entirely. Don’t know what to do for a bundle of questions? Simply read the directions for that section. You will have to get the answer right because now you know what you’re doing! No need to ask your teacher any questions because everything will always be perfectly clear. #toosmart

 

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