Op-ed: Stop Looking at the Climate While it’s Changing, You Perverts!

Dear liberal perverts:

Just when I thought your morals couldn’t sink any lower, you proved me wrong. Nowadays, all I see in the New York Times is “climate change” this, and “climate change” that. Here’s the bottom line: if the climate is changing, you look away! Stop measuring the weather and making your graphs, and shut your eyes, for Christ’s sake! Any decent person knows not to look while someone’s changing. Hell, when I need to try on pants at Nordstrom’s, I go behind a closed door and lock it! So why in tarnation do you think the climate is any different!

Now I don’t care what type of “science” you’re preaching, but that is NO EXCUSE for your behavior. Seriously, Al Gore and the entire scientific community should be put on the sex offender registry. If you stared at my daughter while she was changing, I’d call the freaking cops.

Do you ever see the GOP call attention to rising surface temperatures? Exactly. You know why? Because they have the decency not to stare! And just because the planet got “super hot all of the sudden, ” that is no excuse.

Above: a graph that liberal perverts made of the climate while it was changing. It was published it in a dirty magazine called “Scientific American.”

The REAL pollution in this country is the message that climatologists are sending to our innocent youth. I have eight sons and nine daughters, and everyday, I ask myself: what world do I want to leave for them when I die? If you care at all about the future generations of this planet, you should be pissed off at the complete disrespect being shown for the climate’s privacy. I will not stand for this!

Sincerely,

Michael Spinach

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