Category Archives: Entertainment

From the Archives: “Goo Goo Ga Ga,” Says Barack Obama, 1

We aren’t sure why, but we sat down with an infant by the name of Barack Hussein Obama II to talk all things economics, healthcare, and political reform. You know, of course, that international political demagogues and malefactors are intent on condemning the United States government’s attempts to establish liberty and democracy abroad as “imperialist.” Within the confines of your philosophy, how do you think we should best approach diplomatic relations with foreign nations whose ethical principles conflict with American

Heroism: Local Woman Explains Manifesting to Homeless Person

After driving five minutes from her Evanston home to Target, 26-year-old Rebecca White noticed what seemed to be an unhoused neighbor standing by the door. The woman then told the man that she could alleviate his suffering through one simple process: manifestation. “I normally would have just walked by, but today I heard one more voice than usual inside my head and it told me to talk to this unhoused man, that it could change his life,” she said. “So

Ask Flippy: Do you think Damian Lillard says “It’s Dame Time” before he has sex?

Dear Flippy, After watching Damian Lillard win the NBA All-Star 3-Point Contest for the second straight year, a burning question came over me. He’s always introduced with the phrase, “It’s Dame Time!” and then he points at his wrist accordingly. It’s cool, it’s fun, whatever. But I began to think about its real life applications. I’ve heard that Lillard is as clutch in the sheets as he is on the court. Thus, do you think he says, “It’s Dame Time!”

The Little Lesbian from Boygenius cast in “The Sandlot” Reboot following Hiatus

While more recent movies have used digital technology to “de-age” their actors, Coen says that isn’t a worry for his “Sandlot” film. “We actually have to age her more. When we did a costume fitting, she left in the middle of it to go to craft services and security got called four times because they thought she was an unaccompanied minor.”

5 Minute Crafts Debuts Tutorial On How To Mold Soft Infant Heads Into Nice Centerpiece Vase

The social media page “5 Minute Crafts” has been known to post some kooky content in the past ranging from weird to downright insane. It’s almost like the channel has lost its way and has sacrificed pragmatism for clickbait. Their latest creation, though, is no mere fluff piece. 5 Minute Crafts finally reconnected with their roots and debuted a tutorial we can all appreciate: “How to Mold an Infant’s Soft Skull Into a Nice Centerpiece Vase.” Normally, children are loud,

Porn Parody Of Superbowl: “Superballs: Queefs vs 69ers,” To Also Feature Usher As Halftime Entertainment

“I’ve been a fan of the Superballs series since probably day one,” said Usher in an exclusive Skype interview. “Being the first official halftime headliner of Superballs is a dream come true for me. That’s honestly the only reason why I said yes to the Super Bowl, because I knew that the Superballs call was right around the corner.”

Despicable Me 4 Trailer Reveals Minions Led The January 6 Attack

This past Sunday, Universal Pictures released the trailer for Despicable Me 4, revealing not only the studio’s plan of milking this franchise until its teats fall off, but also the minions’ participation in the January 6 attack on the US Capitol. Recovered security tapes shows the small tic-tac-shaped insurrectionists using their overwhelming numbers to create a living ladder to scale the Capitol’s outer fences and swarm security personnel. There is also footage of the minions replacing historical artwork with humorless

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