He has also been practicing his speed and acrobatic skills, the agent reported, just in case the reason you left him was because he wasn’t good enough at flying. The bird swears he’s better now, even though he’s developed grey feathers and cataracts, and will be so much more fun to be around if you would just start visiting him again.
Category Archives: Sci/Tech
New study by Nestle-Kroger-Mills-Kraft-Heinz conglomerate finds shoveling sugar into mouth at relentless pace actually good for you
The research, fondly dubbed the “Sweet Saccharin Study” undoes decades of anti-dextrose discourse. Doctors everywhere are reading the Sweet Saccharin Study with bewilderment, quitting their jobs, and wondering how they got it so wrong.
Northwestern Administration figured there may as well be an enjoyable experience at the end of the long-ass wait.
Putting one’s head inside a running microwave could allegedly, maybe, possibly cause cancer.
Obit: Local Student Found Dead After Being on Hold with Residential Services About Mold in Bobb for 17 Hours
“By the time it went to voicemail sixteen hours later, spores were already growing out of her corpse.”
The study, conducted amongst top-ten ranking schools in collaboration with the Collective of United Mansplainers (CUM), revealed interesting neurological and physiological responses triggered in the male brain.
“My face is flakier than Northwestern’s male population, and my knees and elbows are so cracked that James Franco could get trapped down there for 127 hours.”
“Here for a long time, not a good time”
“I got a text from Color last night saying ‘What that mouth do?’”
Instagram Announces that They’ll Automatically Block the Story Feature From All Theatre Kids Doing Takeovers On Opening Night
A whopping 78% actually report the accounts that posted the stories for spam content