Category Archives: Politics

Lack of Red Wave Attributed to Republicans not getting a “Triple-thick Black and White Milkshake” after Voting

Some Republicans are calling fraud about who got a triple-thick black and white milkshake or not, specifically regarding the milk-makeup of the shake. “If you got oat milk instead of real milk it shouldn’t count,” representative Lauren Boebert remarked. “Any weak Lib who can’t handle real American milk is not a real American.”

Final Women’s History Month Announced for 2023

There have also been various movements to decide what should replace these lost Women’s History Months. Polling aggregate and news site Buzzfeed is the current battleground for the decision. According to the website, the current leading options are Free Dairy Queen Cone Month, Pride Month 2, Grandparents’ Month, and Monthy McMonthface.

Joe Biden Dazzles White House Press Corps by Driving New Electric Truck Over Journalist at Top Speed

After a lightning-fast lap around the facility, Biden continued speeding directly towards the group of journalists unobserved, aided by the silence of the new state-of-the-art electric engine. However, they were soon made aware of his presence as he ran over the journalist who had earlier asked him for comment at top speed.

« Older Entries