Category Archives: Opinion

Op-Ed: Why Crumbing Your Nature Valley Granola Bar On The Floor Of Shepard Lounge Promotes Job Security

Growing up, we’re taught to clean up after ourselves. In school, we’re encouraged to leave places better than we found them. At restaurants, we stack our plates to make it easier for the staff to clear tables. I was once one to fulfill all these principles. A significant number of other people are as well, all in the name of being “considerate.” My entire worldview changed while shopping with my cousin at Walmart one day. I knocked something off a

Op-Ed: I Found Out Dance Marathon Wasn’t An Actual Marathon AFTER Doing The Cha-Cha Slide For 26.2 Miles

It wasn’t easy. Sometimes, I felt my elbows revert to jogging elbows. But I re-focused and got back into my rhythm every time. I had some other struggles when I reached Chicago, such as bumping into people when I followed the lyrics of “slide to the left.” I felt self-conscious when I had to clap my hands in rapid succession – people definitely stared. Yet, through all those trials and tribulations, I persevered. When I completed those 26.2 miles, I cried tears of joy.

Op-Ed: In A World Full Of “Tits Or Ass,” Be A Lymph Nodes Guy

Cause you see, I’ve seen you men. You men, who mock your beautiful girlfriends and their Korean skincare collections, their pimple patches and their salicylic acid serums. And one day, when she’s had enough of you dipping into her Olaplex budget to buy battle passes, she’s going to look to someone who understands her. Someone who cares that Glossier just got added to Sephora. Someone that will, oh, I don’t know, rub her neck when she’s stressed out.

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