Category Archives: Year 16

Investigation Uncovers University President Michael Schill’s Spotify Account Featuring Playlists Titled “songs to listen to while my administration guts student org funding <3" and "sCHILL vibes"

Many students were indignant after one of his playlists was revealed to be named “Songs to listen to while my admin guts student org funding <3.” The playlist included songs such as “Anti-Hero” by Taylor Swift and “Bad” by Michael Jackson.

Op-Ed: Why Crumbing Your Nature Valley Granola Bar On The Floor Of Shepard Lounge Promotes Job Security

Growing up, we’re taught to clean up after ourselves. In school, we’re encouraged to leave places better than we found them. At restaurants, we stack our plates to make it easier for the staff to clear tables. I was once one to fulfill all these principles. A significant number of other people are as well, all in the name of being “considerate.” My entire worldview changed while shopping with my cousin at Walmart one day. I knocked something off a

Northwestern Student’s Unique Accommodation: “I’m Allergic To Any Dorms That Don’t Rhyme With Kincoln Or Lemper”

Northwestern prides itself on being very accessible and accommodating students’ needs, no matter what they are. However, one student’s recent accommodation has administration racing to research this unique condition. “I’m allergic to any dorms that don’t rhyme with Kincoln or Lemper,” a rising sophomore claimed. The student further explained that he needs to be placed in dorms that specifically fit this designation, or else there would be serious consequences. “I would probably spontaneously combust,” the student said, when asked what

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