Author Archives: Izzy Killian

Op-Ed: To The Campus Coyote – Stay Away From Campus…Or Else…You Wouldn’t Want To Deal With Me On A Full Moon…

“So, I heard there was a coyote running around campus the other day, wreaking havoc…heh…pathetic.” *I stand up from my chair, my large black boots hitting the ground. I have on a tight black top with a leather miniskirt and fishnets. I open my emerald green orbs and smile the smile of someone who is the opposite of sane.* “You want to know my name?” I growl. “Since when has any1 wanted 2 know my name?” “Most days, I lurk

Porn Parody Of Superbowl: “Superballs: Queefs vs 69ers,” To Also Feature Usher As Halftime Entertainment

“I’ve been a fan of the Superballs series since probably day one,” said Usher in an exclusive Skype interview. “Being the first official halftime headliner of Superballs is a dream come true for me. That’s honestly the only reason why I said yes to the Super Bowl, because I knew that the Superballs call was right around the corner.”

We Asked Northwestern’s Men’s Basketball Team Where They Were When Gene Wilder Died

In honor of Bee-One-Gee basketball starting up again, our dedicated sports journalists here at The Flipside asked our own Wildcat Men’s Basketball Team where they were when Gene Wilder died. Brooks Barnhizer: I was at home with my family, when suddenly we got the call to turn the TV on to the news. I almost couldn’t believe my eyes, that he was really gone. I knew right then and there that our country would never be the same. Ty Berry:

Op-Ed: In A World Full Of “Tits Or Ass,” Be A Lymph Nodes Guy

Cause you see, I’ve seen you men. You men, who mock your beautiful girlfriends and their Korean skincare collections, their pimple patches and their salicylic acid serums. And one day, when she’s had enough of you dipping into her Olaplex budget to buy battle passes, she’s going to look to someone who understands her. Someone who cares that Glossier just got added to Sephora. Someone that will, oh, I don’t know, rub her neck when she’s stressed out.

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