Category Archives: No. 374

Student Found Sobbing After Astronomy Midterm: “I’M A FUCKING SCORPIO, OKAY?”

Lost in the backrooms of Tech, student Aurora Borealis was found breaking down on floor 2, wing Z, hallway θ, inlet ♥, in closet ✴. After being carted to the nearest CAPS office, she admitted what was troubling her: her recent astronomy exam. Unfortunately, there were no zodiac sign questions in sight for this solemn Scorpio. Even after Professor Smutko had made it abundantly clear on day one that it would not be an astrology class, some people were too

Student Announces Big Plans Coming: “There Are Big Plan Coming”: Big Plans Coming for Student: Friends Keep Laughing at “Coming”

Big plans, they come soon, coming soon. Plans, so big, very big, coming this way soon. Plans will come over everywhere soon. Coming, plans are, and there are big, for student, coming for student, in a big way, plans, plans, coming student bigging soon. Oh my gosh, it is going to come soon.