Kristen Stewart Emotes in Breaking Dawn, Credits Method Acting

HOLLYWOOD – Kristen Stewart, star of the recently released Breaking Dawn film, has finally displayed some recognizable emotion other than apathy, The Flipside reports.

Known for her unorthodox methods that generally revolve around an inability to portray human traits or emotions, Stewart has always credited her success to the techniques of method acting. Method acting, a practice first developed in New York theatres in the 1930s, involves deeply immersing oneself in the thoughts, feelings, and emotions of the portrayed character.

“I’m like, really good at most vegetables, and I can do furniture,” says Stewart. “However, Bella Swan has always been a challenge. I knew that I’d have some trouble fully portraying the character’s wide emotional range, so I decided to try out a different kind of role in preparation for the epic fourth movie.”

Instead of her usual grueling preparations for Bella, which involve several days in isolation imitating trees, statues, and posters of herself, Stewart decided to immerse herself in the character of “EdwardzchicaXOXO,” creator of renowned Twilight fan site and self-proclaimed “Edward Cullen Groupie.” Along with extensive perusal of the site itself, Stewart met with the fan on several occasions, discussing the tween’s potent feelings for the fictional vampire hunk.

“Most 7th grade girls are obsessed with my co-star, but this chick takes the fucking cake,” remarks Stewart. “After reciting an entire chapter of New Moon word for word, she showed me her Edward shrine. I won’t go into detail about that part for your sake, but let’s just say I was convinced that she is the biggest Twilight fan out there.”

Stewart’s training with EdwardzchicaXOXO was evidently successful, as seen in Breaking Dawn. The actress altered her facial features significantly around 20 minutes into the film, during a scene in which she and Edward Cullen have sexual relations for the first time since the beginning of their frustratingly tense, many-year relationship.

“It was like, so gratifying to see that my work with Edwardzchica paid off,” gushes Stewart, dragging heavily on a cigarette and spray-painting her hair blacker. “Now that I’ve been able to alter my facial expressions, maybe I can move onto changing the intonation and pitch of my voice as well.”

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