Fraternity Inspires PED Testing for Dance Marathon
DM officials are investigating the serious possibility that last year’s complete absence of fainting frat bros was due to blood doping and other performance enhancing drugs.
Category Archives: Local
Weinberg to Introduce GNDR ST 230: Intro to Misogyny for Diversity Requirement
There is disagreement on whether the scope of inequalities studied should be national or international, and whether Northwestern had ever experienced an instance of racism, social injustice, or cultural insensitivity.
OPINION: Gone Greek Night, Bruno Help Me
Gone Greek Night is unique in that it is possibly the only time of the year before Dillo Day where pounding five shots of Skol at 3:30 in the afternoon is expected, not shunned.
ASG to Hold Debate on Dress Color
Student organizations such as GoldDivest and the Coalition for Black and Blue have sprung up with various platforms based on the RGB values in the popular picture.
Morty Announces GPA Acceptance Week
Your level of academic prowess shouldn’t affect your self-esteem.
“Falafel”izing With Jane Medford: What is Real Food?
“Can man survive without food? Can Left Shark survive without Right Shark?”
Frat Boy Holds Press Conference to Confess Lies, Regrets
I deeply regret not getting as turnt as I said I did.
Flipside Investigator Recovers Speed Dating Notes
#3 seems a little on edge when I ask him what the perfect our wedding would look like. He gets a very important phone call about halfway through. Poor guy’s dorm is on fire so he has to leave right away.
CTA Offers Northwestern Students Additional Opportunity to Ignore Chicago
“An additional evening Purple Express train would give Northwestern students a new chance to disregard access to the entertainment, leisure, and career possibilities awaiting them in the beautiful city of Chicago.”
A Love Letter from a Frat Pledge to his Clothing
Do you know what the other brothers at Tappa Tappa Keg would think if I wore pants of a color other than that of a fish? Or if they saw me wearing shoes actually meant to be worn somewhere other than a boat?