Tag Archives: Sheil Catholic Center

NU Chemistry Department Loses Accreditation for Serving Ethanol to Minors

EVANSTON – Following NU Student Affairs’s decision to disassociate with Chabad House due to clashes over university alcohol policy, Northwestern’s Chemistry department has been stripped of accreditation following reports that ethanol was served to minors during a recent lab. Department chair Elizabeth Locke protested the decision, claiming that providing disciples with ethanol has been a “central tenet” of chemistry for centuries. Although Locke does not deny the charges levied against her department, she has attempted to assure administrators and parents

Pope Shrunk, Trapped Inside Catholic Center

By Pope Benedict XVI EVANSTON – Help!!! I’m trapped inside the Sheil Catholic Center. Can’t you people see me banging on the window? I’m trapped for Pete’s sake! I don’t know how, but I woke up in a strange place and the next thing you know, I’m tiny. They shrunk me so that I can’t escape what has become an impenetrable fortress. Someone needs to do something. When I find out who’s done this, they’re most certainly going to get