“This Turkey Is Making Me Sleepy,” Says Aunt Lydia Who Is Three Quarters Of A Wine Bottle Deep

Towards the end of a mostly politics-free Thanksgiving dinner, your Aunt Lydia took the opportunity to loudly inform everyone that the three slices of turkey breast she ate was starting to make her sleepy. However, all anyone could look at was the nearly-empty bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon an arm’s reach away from her.

“I guess what they say is true,” Aunt Lydia is reported to have slurred as she waved her wine glass in the air. “Eating too much turkey makes you tired, and believe me, I am very tired.”

Following Aunt Lydia’s claim, you made eye contact with your mother who pursed her lips and gently shook her head.

Though the mutual understanding in the dining room was to brush off what your aunt had said, your younger brother Jake reportedly asked Lydia, “Are you sure about that?”

However, by the time Jake asked, Aunt Lydia had closed her eyes and dozed off. Your Uncle Luis then stood up and took away the bottle of wine and is said to have reassured the room that this was Lydia’s first time drinking since giving birth to your baby cousin, Tommy.

Uncle Luis carried Lydia to the guest bedroom where she slept soundly during the post-dinner conversations. After waking up, Aunt Lydia reportedly told your mother that dinner was delicious and asked for the recipe to the cranberry sauce.

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