Today when I was walking around campus, I noticed a historical landmark sign that I had never seen before. It read: “Here lies Lake Michigan, 12000 BC – 2200 AD.” I was shocked by this because when I looked down, all I saw was the beautiful concrete that I love so much! I assumed Northwestern had always been situated between the lands of northern Chicago and the Great Concrete Basin, so I was surprised to learn about this history.

I couldn’t imagine having to deal with a lake – the wind, the cold, the mist. The concrete is so predictable – I always know exactly what I’m gonna get with it. My feet are accustomed to the superb flatness of it, and thank goodness, because it feels great on my flat feet. I also just heard that humans used to have arches in their feet – can you believe that?

The sign also informed me that the “Great Concrete Transformation” began in 2025 with the completion of Cohen Lawn. I wish I had been around when that was finished; I can only imagine the excitement that came when everyone saw the freshly laid concrete, covering that stupid, ugly grass. Now, there’s one patch of grass left on campus, right by the arch, as a sort of memorial to the past, but I always scoff when I see it. It’s really quite an eyesore.

Anyways, I’m about to go study on the Concrete-Fill, which is a mini concrete basin next to the Great Concrete Basin. It’s right in the middle of campus, and it’s my favorite place to hang out because it has a fantastic view of all the other concrete. Who knows, maybe that used to be a lake too!