My roommate is addicted to āthe hub?ā Why would anyone jerk off to a GitHub repository?
My roommate recently confided his deepest, darkest secret to me: whenever Iām not in the room, he watches āthe Hubā and masturbates.
Author Archives: Stephen Walsh
Inspired by Oklahoma Bible Mandate, Trump’s Department of Education to Require DVD Copy of “Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel” in Every US Classroom
āLeftists have taken over our education system and are teaching our children to hate America!ā a Trump administration spokesperson proclaimed to the Flipside in a recent interview. āPresident Trumpās top priority in education is to bring patriotism, western morality, and the word of the Lord back into the American classroom, and weāve decided the best way to do that is with the celebrated 2009 film Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakuel.ā The specific movie was chosen because it is āPerhaps
Op-Ed: Look How Quirky I Am, Iām Drinking From a Silly Straw and Speaking in Tongues
āIām not like other girlsā I think to myself as I sip my almond milk latte from my silly straw, listening to the least popular Lana Del Rey songs on Spotify. My laptop is adorned with quotes from shows obscure enough that people are impressed that I know about them, but not so obscure that they canāt recognize them and shower me with praise. And, if thatās not enough, Iām possessed by an ancient Babylonian demon and levitating and speaking in tongues.
To My Teachers: Maybe Itās Good That Iām Not Using My Full Potential
Maybe Iām the only thing that stands between the world and the madness that is me.