Study: NHL Fans Only Care About Fights
While Americans have claim to March Madness, May Mayhem, February Fever, and July Jaundice, April Anger is the pride and joy of every self-respecting Canadian.
Tag Archives: Hockey
Norris Officials Urge NHL to Further Delay Season for “Ice Maintenance”
EVANSTON — After opening the lockout-shortened NHL season with the first set of games on Saturday, officials from the Norris University Center have sent an urgent plea to NHL commissioner Gary Bettman to cancel more games, citing the need for “ice maintenance.” Norris issued a press release that stated, “Our ice-readiness experts have spent years studying the advanced science of what is frozen water and what is not. It is their belief from viewing the NHL’s Saturday games that these
Rev. Jessie Jackson Deems White League IM Sports “Racist”
EVANSTON—The Reverend Jessie Jackson was in the Evanston area this past week. He was impressed by the university, specifically the “demeanor and standard to which Northwestern students hold themselves.” His temperament soon changed, however, after learning of NU’s intramural sports. “They have a white league? That ain’t right,” Jackson clamored. The white league offers sports like hockey, soccer, and, of course, polo. It’s obvious to see why the league has no ethnic diversity. Non-Caucasians are not prohibited from participating. Their