“Such emails serve absolutely no purpose, other than reminding the majority of students how shitty they are for not reading whatever book it was that they were supposed to.”
Consternation and significant pushback from angry students on campus calling for a reversal was… actually nowhere to be seen.
“I didn’t know if I was really supposed to read it or not.” Shetterly said. “But then I started getting more and more emails about it towards the end of the summer and I kinda freaked out, so I decided to just not read it. Also, since when are books like 200 pages?”
At most there were a few sharp inhales, but that was as close to laughter as Schapiro got.
“We know people don’t really read the One Book,” she explained, “but if it is filled with drawings of lovable ninja adolescents and their enlightening journeys to become the greatest Hokage the village has ever had, what college student could possibly pass that up?”