Author Archives: Tyler Dillon

NU Best in Midwest, Second in Qatar

NEW YORK—Last week Forbes magazine published its annual list of best colleges in the United States, naming Northwestern University as the best in the Midwest. To the confusion of campus officials, however, Northwestern’s Qatar branch fell short of the University’s overall ranking, reaching only second place in the Middle Eastern nation.  The international campus, home to journalism and communication programs, fell just below the Doha Academy of Advanced Explosive Weaponry (DAAEW).  Editors at the magazine cited prospects for future graduates

Professors Fail to Satisfy Freshmen; Midterm Exams Deemed Premature

EVANSTON—Hundreds of freshmen students have voiced complaints against the inadequate time professors spend on preparations for midterm examinations.  Virgins to the quarter system, their groans reached a climax on Tuesday, when French professor Jim Levenstein announced that students would begin their oral exams two weeks ahead of schedule. “It’s not fair,” moaned freshman Nadia Horner, a student of Professor Levenstein. “just as I’m totally getting into the class and learning some new things, he tells us we have to perform

UN: Red Cross Flooded Pakistan to Raise Awareness

NEW YORK—Last Friday, the United Nations Subcommittee on Natural Disasters released a report crediting the International Committee of the Red Cross (ICRC) with the recent Pakistani floods that have left 21 million homeless. The investigation cited anonymous sources in the organization, who said the disaster created “new publicity and fundraising opportunities.” Red Cross President Jakob Kellenberger immediately accepted full responsibility for the floods. In a recent press conference, the President promised that, due to conflict-of-interest concerns, the organization would remove