“I mean, I feel like I could do DM in one afternoon and get the same out of it,” continued the same person who watched every season of American Dad at least three times.
He has already texted his parents about his date, and he hopes to get coffee on the Lakefill with her before it freezes over.
Some former dancers have revealed the particularly decrepit conditions inside “the tent,” as it’s popularly called on the inside.
Sources say executive members hope to top their earnings from last year so they can help more starving children or people with cancer or something like that.
Queen B tweeted a picture of her magnificent thighs emblazoned with a large purple ‘N’ and the caption “Coming for you xo.”
DM officials are investigating the serious possibility that last year’s complete absence of fainting frat bros was due to blood doping and other performance enhancing drugs.
Charleston and the ACLU claim that dancing for so long is both “degrading to human dignity” and “patently unnecessary,” thereby meeting two of the principles that would render the punishment “cruel and unusual.”
McClaren packaged his product and took it to the outlying neighborhoods of Chicago, where he sold it to other dealers, homeless addicts, and several mayors of various Canadian cities. He used a portion of the profits to fund the production of the next batch and the rest went to his DM fund.
With registration for Northwestern University’s 40th annual Dance Marathon closing Oct. 25, many students are debating the merits of dancing for 30 hours. The Flipside asked proponents of two opposing viewpoints to present a list of reasons for and against participating in DM.
Ugh. I could totally get in here. This is dumb. I don’t even know why you would want to come to school here. Like Willie the Wildcat? Seriously? Dumb. This place is probably full of UChicago rejects. My (insert standardized state tests here) scores were in the 99th percentile. I got a letter from the Governor, the actual Governor of (insert state with said standardized test here). Northwestern would be my super safety. I’m the smart one. Mom told me.