I’ve learned that even the best of mentors or the most Peruvian of hallucinogens can’t necessarily help in a situation as dire as mine. Some storms must be weathered alone.
After paramedics arrived to whisk Carlson off to the hospital, Norris staff made the decision to shut down the rink indefinitely.
Reports from the sidelines at Levi’s Stadium confirm that during the opening kickoff for Sunday’s Super Bowl 50, Trevor Siemian could be seen shaking his keys at the North Carolina Panthers fan base.
Many Northwestern fans have expressed their surprise that the man who recorded more interceptions per game than he did scores has a legitimate chance at earning a championship ring in his first professional season.
In his research, Dr. Critter has studied numerous incidents where Northwestern students have repeatedly done things that are “just plain stupid.”
“There’s just so many hours in the day. I always have time to complete my homework five days in advance, attend four meetings a day, and sing my baby sister to sleep on the phone.”
“This isn’t the first time in my life that I have pulled out,” he said. “In fact, I believe that I have become an expert at judging when to pull out.”
“Paid fraternity leave will end discrimination based on Greek affiliation and make our society better because of it.”
Despite the fact that no other part of the gym is under construction, many students reportedly feel that they just cannot get a decent workout in these conditions.
“This gives us the opportunity to reach out even more to a population that is clearly faced with extreme socioeconomic disadvantages.”