When the Gophers began to score, the article, along with Olsen’s mental state, took a turn for the worse. Close friends witnessed Olsen banging on her keyboard furiously, shouting various slurs against Minnesotans and gophers.
ST. PAUL, MN — Fulfilling the prophecies of evangelical Christians nation-wide, the state of Minnesota has come down with a case of same-sex marriage after failing to keep its distance from infected state Iowa. The contagious legislation was signed into law Monday and the hellfire-summoning nuptials will begin in August. State Representative Chip Cravaack says he “totally called” the transformation of the state’s legislative orientation: “I knew when Minnesota started hanging out with the abnormal, deviant states, it would catch
MINNEAPOLIS—Minnesota Vikings quarterback and NFL great Brett Favre held a press conference today to announce that he would no longer be conducting press conferences. “This is a hard decision for me and my family,” Brett informed the media, “but I feel I can no longer execute solid press conferences like I could in Green Bay.” Favre then began crying and stated that he would offer no further comment. The announcement came as a surprise to many, who didn’t think Favre