Study: Rush of Dopamine Frat Boys Get From Wearing Salmon Comparable to Orgasm
“Whenever I put them on I can feel the increase in testosterone and dopamine immediately. Yesterday I wore them and I chucked my Sperry’s at the TV.”
Professor Takes 15 Minutes To Play A Movie Clip In Lecture After Nobody Volunteers As The “Computer Person”
In a far from unprecedented move, Professor Irene Teck spent the first 15 minutes of her 50 minute lecture struggling to play a movie clip after no student was willing to offer their assistance as the “computer person.”
Student Makes Slightly Too Self-Deprecating Joke, No One Laughs
“I don’t know whether it was the timing, or the wording, or the fact that Eric’s grandmother just died, but for some reason, me ironically mentioning my desire to ascend from this mortal plane wasn’t well-received,” said the student at the heart of this unprecedented development, who wishes to remain nameless.
Report: Your Grandma More Likely to Donate to a Nigerian Prince Than Your Dance Marathon Campaign
“I’m pretty sure he’s always gotten the majority of the birthday money. I’ve made my peace with it.”
Flipside’s Guide to the Oscars
This guide is guaranteed to help your impress your pretentious RTVF friends and possibly make a lot of money betting big in Vegas!Â
Arthur Butz Challenges Kanazawa to Steel Cage Match
“This fifty-six-year-old spring chicken thinks he can walk in and take my title of academic with shittiest opinions on campus?”
Gambling Club Runs out of Funding, But They Don’t Have a Problem, Damnit
“Look, it’s just a bit of bad luck, but when the water level’s low, you know the tidal wave is coming soon. We just need like $500 spotted and this club will pay out, guaranteed,” reported club president and failing statistics major, Bobby Fletcher.
Photo Captioned “If You Know, You Know,” Actually Ploy to Pretend Something Happened at Party
After reviewing the footage, Porter discovered that someone brought an apple to the party.
Film Student Disappointed by Mise-en-scène in Porn
“It’s become some cheap extraction of real images made into a product of subjective manipulation with reality! Who’s gonna fap to that?” remarked the first-year, who admits to having no issues with using the school wi-fi
Disney eyeing live-action Song of the South remake
Industry insiders speculate that Virginia Governor Ralph Northam is being considered to play the lead role.