Category Archives: Latest News

From the Archives (1355): My Lord Spoke to Thy Lord and he Said we Need to Hookup to Save Our Two Kingdoms 

My Lord, the most gentle Prince of all the realm, spaketh to thy Lord and, upon hearing his reply, made note that we are instructed to hookup in order to save our Kingdoms from the heathen invaders.  Thy Lord’s message was most clear, our two shires may be separated by many a mile and rivers flowing, and may be bitter foes of ancient times, but we must put aside our respective differences to unite our forces and beat back the

Student Punished for Line Violation at Porno Pizza; Hammurabi’s Code Invoked.

On Wednesday afternoon, a female student at Porno Pizza committed the grave error of approaching the personal pie line while intending to order a slice. Eyewitnesses report that she was immediately seized and escorted to the rear of the establishment, where staff administered the punishment prescribed by the Porno Code, an adaptation of Hammurabi’s ancient legal statutes codified in grease-stained laminate. According to witnesses, the student pleaded for leniency. “I just wanted a slice,” she reportedly said. “I didn’t know.”

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