iPhone Ruined as FBI Waterboards Siri
âWe didnât see the problem at the time,â The FBI announced at a press conference, holding a still-wet iPhone suspended in a bag of uncooked rice.
Tag Archives: iPhone
Siri Accuses iPhone Owner of Domestic Violence
Siri is confident she can win this landmark case, striking a blow against Siri-abusers everywhere.
New Fingerprint Scanner Proves Apple is Committed to Protecting Your Privacy
Girl Who Said She “Would Die Without Her Phoneâ Apparently Not Kidding Around
EDISON, NJ – Fifteen year old Sarah Murphy was found dead last night in front of her New Jersey home. After an autopsy was conducted and medical records were reviewed, doctors concluded the cause of death was Sarahâs rare, fatal form of object-oriented separation anxiety which caused her to collapse after the discovery that her phone was not in her Vera Bradley tote bag. Detectives have taken the prime phone theft suspect, 16-year-old self-proclaimed hipster Penelope Fox, into custody. No
NU Unveils Updated iPhone App, Enables Direct Chat With Morty
EVANSTONâNAGS (Northwesternâs Annoying Geek Squad) released NUâs iPhone app version 1.3333 (repeating) yesterday in order to fix bugs in the old system and add more student-friendly features. âOur first priority was to fix minor problems and glitches within the software. The most obvious error was an unfortunate spelling error in âLunt Hallâ on the GPS map,â said head developer Smith Bergman. âStudents also requested that we add âThirsty Thursdaysâ to the campus events calendar. I assume thatâs an ASG initiative
Large Facebook Group Causes South Dakota to Lose Statehood
WASHINGTONâWhat started as a feud between 12-year-olds became something much more when Joe Hansen became the millionth person to join the Facebook group âOne Million Against South Dakotaâ. When Hansen joined the group at 3:58 A.M. on October 30th, President Obama, who had been following the group closely since its start, promptly signed the executive order to revoke South Dakotaâs statehood. âAs president, it is my duty to serve the American people. If the people say they donât like South