“I never thought this would happen, dude,” lamented Burt McDover, who looked after Post Malone’s head lice. “Posty said he just wanted to try taking a quick shower because all his buddies did it every day. It’s the newest trend, you know?”
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“Yeah, my parents and siblings will be here, so I’m going to pretend not to be disgusting for a couple days,” said Sanders in an interview.
The witness told The Flipside that “every time we tried to talk him down, he just kept stroking his ego more and more.”
“I’ve started to lose feeling in my leg,” Gonzalez says. “Every time I take a step it feels really tingly, kind of like someone is stabbing me with a blade covered in hot sauce.”