Opinion: Don’t Deport Justin Bieber, Canada Still Has Hope
Keep the issue contained and save the Canadian youth. It’s too late for our own.
Category Archives: Archives
Rowling Pens Final Installment: Harry Potter and the Custody Feud
And you thought “all was well” meant happily ever after.
Type 2 Diabetes Traced Back to Neanderthals, Herpes Still Totally Our Bad
A Modest Proposal (for the Heating of the Evanston Area)
Guest columnist Jonathan Swift proposes a simple and effective solution to Chicago winters: student bonfires.
Dorm Exec Member Way Too into Being Dorm Exec Member
Flipside Previews the Sochi Opening Ceremony
The Flipside presents a list of what to expect from the ceremony, brought to you by a reporter who managed to get an illegal live stream of the ceremony.
Local Shuttle Regrets Leaving You Behind
“It pained me to leave that student behind. The expression on his face as I drove away is frozen into my mind. I see it every time I close my eyes. I can’t sleep at night. I’m a failure,” said the shuttle.
NASA Reveals You Are More Likely to Catch Space Shuttle Than Frostbite Express
Sochi Olympics Debuts New “Extreme” Winter Sports
President Putin has graciously permitted athletes to wear flame-retardant clothing, but notes that only pussies will do so.
Snowden Nominated for Nobel Peace Prize; Assange: “What the Fuck, Guys?”