Rowling Pens Final Installment: Harry Potter and the Custody Feud
And you thought “all was well” meant happily ever after.
Category Archives: Entertainment
Bieber Facing Deportation; Tweens Advocate Immigration Reform
“It’s unfair that hardworking people are denied the right to stay here and help our nation,” said Jennifer Jones, a self-proclaimed diehard Belieber. “Justin Bieber came here to live the American Dream. Why should our country deny him that right?”
Public Outraged That Louisiana Hillbilly Has Negative Views Towards Gays; Robertson’s Feelings Hurt
“I’m baffled why Mr. Robertson never bothered to explore the different communities that surely exist in West Monroe,” remarked UCLA sophomore Quincy LaFleur of San Francisco.
The Flipside Movie Review: Frozen and The Wolf of Wall Street
Both boast a strong cast, an amazing soundtrack, and a whole lot of snow, but we strongly urge all moviegoers to think twice before bringing their children to Frozen.
7 Things That Aren’t as Great as Tina Fey and Amy Poehler Hosting the Golden Globes Again
Who needs compassion and understanding between disparate societies when you can have Tina Fey and Amy Poehler in breath-taking evening gowns telling jokes to other millionaires?
Chet Haze: Where Is He Now?
Life without everyone’s favorite rapper, philosopher and Wildcat has left the Northwestern student body struggling to find its way without Chet’s artistic talent and thoughtful Twitter insights.
Fan Attempts to Save Justin Bieber from Dehydration, Discovers Bieber Cannot Catch
This is not the first time Anderson has attempted to protect the singer’s health. Mark Anderson follows all of Bieber’s tours around the world, continuously monitoring Bieber’s hydration levels.
Chief Keef Oversleeps, Misses Deadline for ED Northwestern Application
The rapper had completed his essays for the application a week prior to the deadline, but had refrained from submitting his application until Friday night, as he hoped to perform one final check for incorrect spelling and grammar.
[Tabloid Issue] Career Porn: Steve Carrell Gets to Be in Movies
America’s Nice Guy starred in The Forty-Year Old Virgin and not The Forty-Year Old Porn Star, but there’s no denying that Steve Carell is at the top of his career porn game: his résumé will leave you sobbing and screaming “sweet Jesus” in the middle of the night.
Kanye West to Recruit Interns through Chicago Field Studies
West outlined the positions he was looking to fill in a long series of tweets. “I need interns to drive my Benzes around, even when I am not in them… I need interns to act as food testers… I need interns to feed me grapes while I listen to my own albums…”