If We Want to Save America, We’ll Have to Put on the Best Talent Show That This Town’s Ever Seen
RACHEL BERRY: Freezing federal funds? Pardoning rioters? Detention center in Guantanamo? Donald Trump has gone too far this time.
Category Archives: Entertainment
Breaking: Theatre Kid Pretty Sure “Defying Gravity” is what an Orgasm Feels Like
“I’d only read about it in that book about my changing body my parents gave me when I was 13,” he told Flipside. Although he admits to doing some “online studying” about the subject before he came to Northwestern, he insists that was just so he could be better prepared in case the school put on a production of Cabaret.Â
Trump Appoints Young Sheldon as Head of Homeland Security
Since November 5th, the president-elect has made several controversial picks for top positions, including Elon Musk heading the so-called “Department of Government Efficiency” (DOGE). However, even many in Trump’s inner circle have objected to his latest and boldest choice: a literal fourteen-year-old child as Secretary of Homeland Security. Sheldon Lee Cooper, of Medford, Texas, turned down a Ph.D. in physics at Caltech to join the incoming administration, saying that “the decision was a no-brainer after Meemaw took me to visit
Trump Creates New “BOOM Department” For Bombing His Enemies, Appoints AJ & Big Justice As Secretaries
While some may have missed the announcement in between Trump’s creation of an “Efficiency Commission” and appointment of a sex criminal to lead the government’s law enforcement agency, the president-elect notably created a “BOOM Department” for bombing his enemies and named AJ & Big Justice as its foremen. Trump originally met AJ & Big Justice while he was working the McDonald’s drive thru. The father-son pair ordered everything on the menu for one of their viral videos and proceeded to
From the Archives: “Goo Goo Ga Ga,” Says Barack Obama, 1
We aren’t sure why, but we sat down with an infant by the name of Barack Hussein Obama II to talk all things economics, healthcare, and political reform.
Op-Ed: Running over someone with a car is okay if you cross your toes while pushing the gas pedal
I don’t condone violence. I don’t condone breaking traffic rules. But I do condone following honor codes typically used by children.
Heroism: Local Woman Explains Manifesting to Homeless Person
After driving five minutes from her Evanston home to Target, 26-year-old Rebecca White noticed what seemed to be an unhoused neighbor standing by the door. The woman then told the man that she could alleviate his suffering through one simple process: manifestation. “I normally would have just walked by, but today I heard one more voice than usual inside my head and it told me to talk to this unhoused man, that it could change his life,” she said. “So
Kamala Harris Launches New Podcast: “Call Her Mamala”
In response, Trump has also launched his own podcast: “Call Me God.”
Cinema: DC Scholars Disappointed by Depiction of Jokers’ Bulge In New Film: “Ball to Cock Ratio Nowhere Near Canonical”
“On that note,” Mr. Freely continued, “I must admit the depiction of Harley Quinn, especially the breast to waist ratio, was done perfectly. I had a hard-on the whole film!”
Ask Flippy: Do you think Damian Lillard says “It’s Dame Time” before he has sex?
Dear Flippy, After watching Damian Lillard win the NBA All-Star 3-Point Contest for the second straight year, a burning question came over me. He’s always introduced with the phrase, “It’s Dame Time!” and then he points at his wrist accordingly. It’s cool, it’s fun, whatever. But I began to think about its real life applications. I’ve heard that Lillard is as clutch in the sheets as he is on the court. Thus, do you think he says, “It’s Dame Time!”