Tag Archives: ice

McCormick Students Face Toughest Challenge Yet: Making Water Freeze

EVANSTON — Every quarter for their DTC projects, groups of McCormick students design various novel devices, from prosthetic arms to penguin feet. This quarter, one unlucky group has been given the most formidable challenge the engineering school has ever proposed: reopening the Norris Ice Rink. “We realize that this is a tough task,” said Mark Turner, a freshman civil engineer. “Even mother nature couldn’t get the ice rink open. That’s where engineering comes in.” The group of eager engineers are

Norris Officials Urge NHL to Further Delay Season for “Ice Maintenance”

EVANSTON — After opening the lockout-shortened NHL season with the first set of games on Saturday, officials from the Norris University Center have sent an urgent plea to NHL commissioner Gary Bettman to cancel more games, citing the need for “ice maintenance.” Norris issued a press release that stated, “Our ice-readiness experts have spent years studying the advanced science of what is frozen water and what is not. It is their belief from viewing the NHL’s Saturday games that these

Northwestern Accepts all 30,000 Applicants, Awards No Aid to Increase Budget

EVANSTON – President Morton Schapiro announced Wednesday that the Admissions Office will not be printing out any rejection letters this year. Schapiro stated that the purpose of this decision was to “allow the benefits of Northwestern to reach as many students as possible.” His eyes then shiftily darted left-to-right several times, and numerous audience members swore that Schapiro said “Cha-ching!” Schapiro’s remarks were made in a joint press conference with University Director of Financial Aid, Carolyn Lindley. Lindley stated that