“Like hello, the first person to offer me a cigarette was wearing Chanel and Dior head to toe. Of course I trusted her.”
The FDA has attached an air of danger and rebellion to a product that makes its users look like they’re smoking a fucking kazoo.
Given the success and unanimous support of Northwestern University’s Associated Student Government’s latest move to ban on-campus tobacco possession, student representatives recently proposed a large number of additional bans designed to improve student life.
EVANSTON – Auguste Rault has faced accusations of being French ever since he came to Northwestern University with a backpack full of baguettes and cigarettes in 2010. Rault, a sophomore French major, claims that this stereotyping is evidence of a culture of ignorance prevalent among “fat, American, spoiled” Northwestern students. Rault, while moodily chain-smoking in the pouring rain, explained that people question him about whether he is French almost weekly. “It’s almost as if a man can’t dwell on the