10 Things We Learned From the Oscars

Too busy studying for DTC to understand why RTVF majors have their panties in a bunch (“Depaul and Colombia? Seriously?”) or why Hugh Jackman would even attempt to follow up Catherine Zeta-Jones and Jennifer Hudson? No worries, here’s the Oscars run-down: Even if you are nominated for an Academy Award, even your characters are named something ridiculous like Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi or after a shampoo brand (what up, Pantene), do not decide what to wear three hours before the

Some New Building to Be Built on Campus, Costs Gazillions

EVANSTON — Northwestern University administration announced today that construction on some long-awaited expensive building of questionable utility is to finally start next month. Spokesman of the Department of New Structures, Allyson Spencer, told The Flipside, “This is a great moment for all 25 people that will actually be using this building, and for the 100+ members of the future cleaning and maintenance staff. Thanks to donations from a random wealthy alumnus, we have the opportunity to provide state-of-the-art facilities for

Class of 2017 Excited to “Hang Out at the Lakefill and Eat Frontera”

THE INTERNET — The Northwestern University Class of 2017 Facebook group saw a three-hundred percent increase in activity this past week when soul-searching accepted student Alyssa Gianonne asked the deep and philosophical question preoccupying every early-decision applicant’s mind: “So what’s everyone, like, MOST excited for next year?” Gianonne commented on her own post thirty seconds later explaining that marching through the historic campus arch, erected in 1993, is something that she predicts will be life changing. Within minutes, Gianonne’s post

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