After making his rounds through the various Sunday dinners hosted by Northwestern fraternities, Star Trek fanatic Kirk Spockard has allegedly found his future brotherhood with âSci-Fiâ.
âUltimately, I think weâre all better off if whiny bitches like Craigery just synchronized their screams, for efficiencyâs sake,â said librarian and professional shusher Rita Lotte.
As the app gains popularity, officials hope students will be inspired by their personalized jerseys and may one day wear them as they sit through an entire game.
“As time went on, the constant drunkenness and mild-homoeroticism really made me feel comfortable.â
Costumes reportedly included timeless classics such as a slutty devil, slutty cat, and slutty alien, but also included throwback outfits like slutty â80s workout instructor and topical statements such as a slutty absentee ballot.
Hereâs the bottom line: if the climate is changing, you look away! Stop measuring the weather and making your graphs, and shut your eyes, for Christâs sake!
âI think the 3.6% strategy really synergizes the business ownerâs desire to make money and impoverish millennials.â
At most there were a few sharp inhales, but that was as close to laughter as Schapiro got.
It was only after receiving an email from Northwestern president Morton Schapiro offering the production company a look into Northwesternâs new five-star rated housing that Diaz knew the new season would be a success.
When Maddie Fisher, WCAS â21, began to plan her dorm room dĂ©cor through a series of Pinterest boards, she had no idea that her basil plant would grow to become such a big part of her life. Inspired by a stack of interior design magazines, Fisher assumed that a basil plant would add to the dĂ©cor of the room. Instead, Fisher found that the plant, Jonathan, was a great listener. Jonathan would listen to her problems with her boyfriend, Jorge,