Category Archives: Archives
Chicago Weather God: “I’m Just Fucking With You”
CHICAGOâFor you, I made it seventy degrees. Now you can wear that new skirt youâve been waiting to show off since, oh, late August. I mean, seriously, that low cut is really cute and everyone is looking at you, babe. Whatâs that you say an hour later? Itâs raining and fifty? My bad. I can’t help but make it rain on them slightly flirtatious but ultimately shy NU girls. If it makes you feel better, Iâll throw in a little hail tonight.
The Flipside is a Joke
EVANSTONâNorthwestern University has a long tradition of great journalism. The Daily Northwestern and North by Northwestern are models of professionalism and journalistic excellence. Yet there is one publication that is an embarrassment to the Northwestern community, journalism, paper, its staff, and their mothers: The Northwestern Flipside. To be blunt, The Flipside is a joke. The writing is a shameless mockery of the journalistic style that we as Northwestern students have come to expect. Itâs like a bunch of people just
Dane Cook Not Funny
Flipside Receives Medill F
EVANSTONâAfter thorough fact-checking, Medill professors and administrators unanimously awarded The Flipside an âFâ for its inordinate amount of factual errors. âThe content was exceptional, but there is no such person at Northwestern as âWeinberg freshman Joe Krawson,ââ said a concerned Medill professor, after reading an article which he thought would profile a very successful student. In a further, shocking investigation, it was uncovered that The Flipside has never quoted a real person. Every single quote is false. The publicationâs president
NU Students React to Tough University Sexile Policy
EVANSTONâSeveral Northwestern University students said Thursday that they hold relaxed views about âsexiling,â a slang word used to describe the act of barring a roommate from entry into living quarters to ensure privacy for intimate relations. âI think people have common sense,â said Joana Smith, Medill freshman. âText if youâre going to bring someone home.â In college campuses across the country, âsexilingâ has become an issue. Tufts University recently created a policy outlawing students from having sex while roommates are
The Flipside Recieves $100 to Further Unknown Publication
EVANSTONâThe Northwestern Associated Student Government and Student Groups Committee gave the widely unknown Northwestern Flipside a whopping $100 to assist in the printing of its satirical publication. Despite applying for the money guaranteed to them as a T-status group in May of 2009, the now pending B-status group has largely been ignored until now. “It’s not that we needed the money for anything important,” Nick Zessis, the President and founder of The Flipside, told The Flipside. “I mean, we weren’t
Dance Marathoner Caught with Performance Enhancing Ecstasy
Earthquake Hits Chile, U.S. out of Fundraising Ideas
SANTIAGO, CHILEâThe earthquake that ravaged Chile this week has left millions of philanthropists confused. After contributing all their efforts to Haiti, people seem to have no charitable spunk left. After countless bakesales, Hulu ads, piggy-bank smashings, and illegal bootleggings for Haiti, people just donât have any money left to give to Chile – or, for that matter, the desire to do so. CNN, in a desperate effort to stay hip, tried to rally their followers with tweets like âsux 4
Student Voted ‘Most Likely to Succeed’ Already Failing
EVANSTONâWeinberg freshman Joe Krawson disappointed his high school graduating class on Monday when he received a failing grade on his macro-economics midterm exam, earning only 23 points out of a possible 50. Only 6 months prior, the 382 seniors of Krawson’s Washburn High School in San Diego, California had voted him the male student “most likely to succeed.” In his position as senior class president at Washburn, Krawson was well-liked for reducing detentions by 40% and for planning “the best