The highly complex testing process included having blood drawn, mopping the deck and sparring with a member of a feuding ship.
Tag Archives: coronavirus
Over the last 8 months, the world has anxiously awaited the development of a cure for COVID-19. However, Pfizer has announced a new vaccine that successfully protects 90% of all people who take it against COVID-19. While many see this as the end-all to coronavirus, others are skeptical over the efficacy of the vaccine. “Ever since I signed up to test the vaccine, my balls have been itching”, said Jay Mast, who asked to remain anonymous, “at first I thought
Op-Ed: I Can’t be the Impostor, I was Filling Out my Daily Symptoms on the Northwestern Symptom Tracker App
Taking advantage of the popularity of Among Us, Northwestern has decided to create a similar game to encourage students to complete tasks that they usually avoid, such as signing up for the NCA career fair.
“Once the lights start blinking, it’s a warning to predators and pathogens alike: don’t mess with the Thermoflash.”
“We were totally gonna get to the whole testing kit thing, but Brandon brought up the point that ending on a thorn lets bad energy into the room,”
“Join our movement today and reject the orb-obsessed mainstream.”
“We saw this as a great opportunity to take care of our medical heroes,” said Megan Locke, a producer on the show. “Plus, the free publicity doesn’t hurt.”
“They all called me ‘Jenny the Weirdo,’ ‘Jenny the Deep Sea Freak,’ ‘Jenny-the-girl-who-got-her-head-stuck-inside-a-beaker-during-a-bio-lab,’” said Smeely, “Oh how the tables have turned!”