Op-Ed: Halloween Not as Scary as Your Familyās Expectations
At least Leatherface doesnāt care how your last interview went.
Category Archives: Featured
Northwestern Secondary to Dress Up as Good Secondary for Halloween
āIt sucks when youāre the unit holding the team back. Halloween is the one day of the year when anybody can be anything ā dreams can come true.”
Area Freshman Blushing after Being Asked to Dance Marathon
He has already texted his parents about his date, and he hopes to get coffee on the Lakefill with her before it freezes over.
Morty Goes as āSexy Safe Spaceā for Halloween
āHis costume totally rejected gender binary,ā said Veronica Keller, SESP ā20. āYou honestly couldnāt tell if he was being slutty in a dude way or a girl way.”
Area Freshman Drops High School Boyfriend Instead
āEach time he texted me something cuteāand weād text for hoursāIād blush and daydream for 10 minutes. Thereās not enough time in a day for all of that, with homework, classes, and my weekly lab.ā
Area Senior Saved Drops for This Year
He has already completed his foreign language requirement, his major requirements, five of the six distro areas, and, for some reason, a minor in geography.
Trump Star Smashed Like Trump Smashes Pussy: Without Consent
More and more Americans are becoming convinced that these were less consensual acts on Mr. Trumpās part than they were an unasked-for hammering.
Anti-Social Loser: I Hate Halloween
āI know college students take a lot of flak for wanting āsafe spaces,ā but thereās just no room on campus for this kind of hate speech.ā
Roommate Mumbles Communist Manifesto in His Sleep
āIāve never had a history of sleep talking and, more importantly, Iāve never read the damn thing!ā
Drunk Friend at Tailgate Will Totally Get Lunch with You Soon
Unfortunately, their spring quarter interactions were limited to quick hugs on Sheridan accompanied by hurried apologies for not staying longer.