Freshman Breaks Arm Skating, Norris Ice Rink Not Safe Space
After paramedics arrived to whisk Carlson off to the hospital, Norris staff made the decision to shut down the rink indefinitely.
Category Archives: Articles
Trevor Siemian Shakes Keys at Panthers
Reports from the sidelines at Levi’s Stadium confirm that during the opening kickoff for Sunday’s Super Bowl 50, Trevor Siemian could be seen shaking his keys at the North Carolina Panthers fan base.
Quarterback Who Only Won Five Games Last Year Headed To Super Bowl 50
Many Northwestern fans have expressed their surprise that the man who recorded more interceptions per game than he did scores has a legitimate chance at earning a championship ring in his first professional season.
Study: The Best and the Brightest Can Still Be Pretty Dumb
In his research, Dr. Critter has studied numerous incidents where Northwestern students have repeatedly done things that are “just plain stupid.”
Area Student Disturbed by Lack of Stress in Life
“There’s just so many hours in the day. I always have time to complete my homework five days in advance, attend four meetings a day, and sing my baby sister to sleep on the phone.”
Santorum Pulls Out
“This isn’t the first time in my life that I have pulled out,” he said. “In fact, I believe that I have become an expert at judging when to pull out.”
Op Ed: It’s Time for Paid Fraternity Leave
“Paid fraternity leave will end discrimination based on Greek affiliation and make our society better because of it.”
SPAC Construction Perfect Excuse Not to Go to Gym
Despite the fact that no other part of the gym is under construction, many students reportedly feel that they just cannot get a decent workout in these conditions.
Evanston Food Bank to Host Bienen Graduate Nights
“This gives us the opportunity to reach out even more to a population that is clearly faced with extreme socioeconomic disadvantages.”
Sheridan Construction Worker Laying the Pipe So Hard
He can be seen sticking his rod into Sheridan just north of the Kellogg building.