First Half of CDC Meeting Just Rose Bud Thorn
âWe were totally gonna get to the whole testing kit thing, but Brandon brought up the point that ending on a thorn lets bad energy into the room,â
Monthly Archives: May 2020
Op-Ed: Thank God Dillo is Online, I Couldn’t Find Funky Shorts to Match My Rainbow Tube Top
I found the perfect rainbow tube top at Urban this summer. Ever since then, Iâve been looking for the right pair of funky shorts, to no avail.
Oedipal Arrangement Terrible Motherâs Day Gift
“When she finally woke me up and I saw her in lingerie, I nearly stabbed my eyes out.â
Local Manâs Quirky Zoom Background Not Enough To Save His Failing Grade
âI donât know who he thinks heâs impressing. It was sorta funny the first week of class, but now itâs just pathetic,â said concerned classmate John Masters.
Flat Earth Society Speaks Out Against Dr. Fauci: âThe Curve Does Not Existâ
“Join our movement today and reject the orb-obsessed mainstream.â
California Student on Zoom Call Shows Everyone How Sunny His Backyard Is
âHuh? I donât remember what background anyone had. Besides, canât you just set your virtual background to anything?â
Fox Donates Masked Singer Costumes to Medical Professionals
âWe saw this as a great opportunity to take care of our medical heroes,â said Megan Locke, a producer on the show. âPlus, the free publicity doesnât hurt.â
Op-Ed: Why Using My Asshole As A Zoom Background Is An Artistic Statement
What better way, then, to light aflame the hearts and minds of my classmates than by plastering my puckered ass skin all over their laptop screens?
RTVF Major Replaces Classes with Criticizing Sisterâs Tik Tok
“Wouldnât you rather listen to a two-hour-long thorough analysis of the silent film The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari than watch a fifteen second video of a tween doing the woah?â
Area Student Wearing Propeller Hat in Zoom Lecture âDoing Just Fine, Why Do You Ask?â
âItâs like she used this tired gimmick to distract us from how self-isolation is deteriorating her mental health,â said her classmate Darrell Jamison, RTVF â22. âThe propeller looks pretty funny, but Iâm not laughing. Iâm concerned.â