Big time investment banker Mr. Maxwell Harrington said, “Fortunately, I can afford to purchase electric lights for my large, impressive house. The poor folk of this town are just going to have to make more money so they can ditch those obsolete candles.”
Chandler posted three get-to-know-me posts in the group so that every new classmate could get a full picture of her.
“I’ve probably got more STIs than I can count, so it’s gonna be really cool to finally find out what some of them are called.”
“We just thought that Sect Week would be an amazing opportunity to enlighten students on the differences and similarities between the many branches of Christianity available for their perusing pleasure.”
Though Joshua was ultimately grounded, it seems this incident may have created a future comedian.
Women’s soccer is now insisting upon real cleats in lieu of university-issued stilettos.
Democratic congressman Adam Schiff, who has spent several months threatening to subpoena a complete copy of “The Lorax”, claimed Wednesday that Americans had a right to the unredacted copy.
Northwestern Students across campus seem to agree that while the punishment is harsh, it’s the only way to get the basketball team to stop losing.