âToo long hath these Pfizer and Moderna knaves parried with the virus. They flash thine fancy swords and dance around in thine gilded boots, but those swineâs art COWARDS. Sir Johnson shall end it all in a single blow!â
Good news! This week, MTV launches a reality series following Kanye Westâs therapist, giving fans a sigh of relief after despair following the Kimye divorce announcement. The show, aptly named âShrink Rapâ follows Westâs therapist Dr. Shakur, a man adamant that he is not in fact Tupac in hiding. As a longtime friend of Kanye West, or Kanye as he lets me call him, I was able to interview Dr. Shakur under one condition: Kanye would accompany me. The notes
Steve, baby, you canât have completely forgotten about the day we had together.
âItâs not bad at all,â she said. âI havenât talked to my husband in almost a decade, and Iâm growing hair out of holes I didnât even know I had. So I canât complain.â
“You know, like, how heâs so tall and sheâs so short that it looks like heâs going to develop chronic back issues from having to stoop down to kiss her? Thatâs what I want.â
No matter the slack you get from the Moms of Springfield Facebook group, donât stop partying!
The public response appears to be mostly positive. The LGBTQ+ community has been quick to embrace this advancement of relations between machine and man, hailing it as âthe Third Industrial Revolutionâ.
I took it upon myself to travel to The Skeld to investigate just how good of a democracy they have.
âI really feel for Olâ Donald during his period of isolation. I simply cannot imagine a night without the tunes boppinâ, a drink in my hand, and a hot wife to rail, much less two weeks! Itâs truly a tragedy of our generation.â
âWe were totally gonna get to the whole testing kit thing, but Brandon brought up the point that ending on a thorn lets bad energy into the room,â