The other day, I went to get my second semiweekly rapid test, expecting the interaction to be the same as usual: walk in, show my silly little apps to the workers, and engage in the voyeuristic practice of having a mid-twenties man make fierce eye contact while I twirl a silly little q-tip in my nose. But all of a sudden, it’s gotten so much worse!
What better way, then, to light aflame the hearts and minds of my classmates than by plastering my puckered ass skin all over their laptop screens?
‘He definitely was the breakout performance. They should have given him a bigger role in the movie.’
“Since the bike path is still complete, students who enjoyed using it to commute more easily from north to south are able to continue to do so, just like they already have been.”
“Leave the chauffeur 20% and you’re not only depriving yourself of yacht money, but you’re also depriving him of the chance to earn himself the dignity of honest work.”
During a review session for the Econ 202 Midterm, sources have reported that local asshole Jeremy Crack (WCAS ’19) commandeered the entire session.
An area biker apologized today, confessing that he really didn’t see you there. This apology follows a near-collision that occurred on the sidewalk in front of the Jacobs Center.
What kind of dicks paint over a racially significant message with white paint?