Disturbing New Study Shows Placing Head Inside Running Microwave Oven May Be Linked to Cancer
Putting one’s head inside a running microwave could allegedly, maybe, possibly cause cancer.
Category Archives: Articles
“Sussy” And 50 Other Words I’d Rather Die Than Hear Alvin of Alvin and the Chipmunks Say
“Uwu”
Close Call! North Campus Resident Narrowly Escapes Willard Party Before Hearing a Single Showtune
Chase’s “bro” and unofficial domestic partner Frad added, “And the only ‘hol they even had was Manischewitz. If I wanted to get slightly tipsy and puke up grape juice I woulda just gone to my sister’s bat Mitzvah this weekend like I was supposed to.”
“Actually, War Crimes Require a Formal Declaration of War. What We do Are Just Run-of-the-Mill Human Rights Violations” Says Department of Defense
“Semantically speaking, war crimes requires a war, and we have not formally declared war since the 1940s.”
Wildcat Geogame Under Fire from UN After Claiming Saxony “Part of Greater Poland”
The geogame clarified, “Bolesław I the Brave, Duke of Poland, claimed Saxony for Greater Poland in 1002.”
How to Wear a Tennis Skirt Un-Ironically
“Here are five ways to style one of Summer 2021’s hottest new trends.”
Joe Biden Dazzles White House Press Corps by Driving New Electric Truck Over Journalist at Top Speed
After a lightning-fast lap around the facility, Biden continued speeding directly towards the group of journalists unobserved, aided by the silence of the new state-of-the-art electric engine. However, they were soon made aware of his presence as he ran over the journalist who had earlier asked him for comment at top speed.
Northwestern PHA Establishes Kappa Moderna & Moderna Moderna Moderna Chapters
“Have a crush on Dr. Fauci? Come watch some of his press conferences with us!”
Professor’s Screenshare Brings Up Wikihow Page for “How to Kiss”
He had paused on step 3 of 32 (“Set the mood with a romantic compliment”).
How To Feng Shui Your Freshman Common Room With One Lone Chair And 17 Ozzis
Window-facing screams “pensive philosophy major thinks they’re better than you and might be.”