“In high school, I was lucky if my dad could remember my best friend’s name or what grade I was in. Now, we talk for hours on the phone about our favorite players on the team and he knows absolutely everything about them. It’s crazy!”
DINOSAUR GO! One must question the system I expect we shall soon find ourselves operating beneath — a system in which the oligarchs of society control the upper echelon outside of the laws binding those beneath them.
Take a risk, and eat your fear, but know your early death lies here…
I should have known something was wrong when the premiere wasn’t even in the Cathedral of Christ the Saviour — our tickets lied to us. I mean — come on — how long does it take to set up a venue?! They’ve been building the thing since 1812, for Christ’s sake!
Mhapiro was a last-minute addition to the debate, entering with black dye dripping down his forehead and frantically reading a sheet of paper that had the words “hip slang the kids are using” Sharpied at the top.
His savvy entrepreneurship made him the BANE of the Union Pacific Railroad!
Hear me, readers and friends, and hear me well! I have found, through multitudinous encounters and experiences, that women aplenty — particularly those born after the year 1666 — know to do little more than consume stew, water thine horses, and blaspheme!
They are a plague on this campus – the likes of which have never been and will never be seen again.
I conducted a completely unbiased poll sent exclusively to other lonely singles, and—sure enough—we have a scourge of couples on campus.
“I was trying to find the perfect outfit to show Lucas from language arts that I’m, like, totally random and adorkable!”