NUFB Says Mayo Tub Fight Night “Not Hazing, Just Business”
Despite outcry from many current and former students, NUFB claims that its most recent scandal — Mayo Tub Fight Night — was “not hazing, just business”.
Category Archives: Latest News
From The Future: University President Finally Emerges From Deep Freezer After Ill-Fated Chill With Schill Event
Schill rejoins a modern faculty comprised primarily of AI lecturers, sentient Lakefill geese and tenure-track professors kept alive on a combination of virgin blood and spite.
“I Pivoted”: The Moment Offset’s Dillo DJ Realized Northwestern Was A PWI
To save the day, he turned to one of his playlists titled “Tighty Whities,” a term he created to describe songs that white people, who still use the word “tight,” think are “tight.”
From the Future: Mandela Reagan Potter, You Were Named for Two of the Bravest Men I Ever Knew
Named for Nelson Mandela, who helped lead the anti-apartheid movement in South Africa and worked fervently towards equality; and for Ronald Reagan, who ensured that my father’s generational wealth would stay where it belonged — in the family — rather than going to the dirty poors
“This Is My Dream School It’s Sooo Beautiful Here,” Class Of ’27 Commit Posts On Snapchat After Taking Picture Of A Particularly Nice Path
“This is my dream school it’s sooo beautiful here,” incoming Weinberg freshman Meadow Deering posted to her Snapchat, accompanied by a photo of a particularly nice path next to Norris.
Investigation Uncovers University President Michael Schill’s Spotify Account Featuring Playlists Titled “songs to listen to while my administration guts student org funding <3" and "sCHILL vibes"
Many students were indignant after one of his playlists was revealed to be named “Songs to listen to while my admin guts student org funding <3.” The playlist included songs such as “Anti-Hero” by Taylor Swift and “Bad” by Michael Jackson.